OK, so today is my birthday! Yeah, happy birthday to me! Last night I was driving home from a sitting with a BEAUTIFUL family! (I will post about them later) As I was driving home, late as usual, the sun was setting. Not just any sunset! Last nights sunset, was remarkable! We don’t get many of those in Fresno because of the air and smog. But we had a nice shower in the morning and it washed all of the gunk away. It was spectacular! Bright colored clouds with deep reds and pinks. Heaven, as my son says, was peeking out from the clouds in streams of light and shadows. It really took my breathe away. I had my camera. I could stop and photograph this wonderful occasion. BUT WAIT! I’m LATE! I needed to get home so that I could feed my children, get them to bed, get lunches packed, yada, yada, yada. I started thinking about how many times in my life that this happens to me. How many times this happens to a lot of us. If I waited, the sunset would be gone. So, I grabbed my camera, while driving 65mph on the freeway, turned it on, while driving 65mph on the freeway, put it on manual and set the settings, while driving 65mph, pointed it out the closed windows and started shooting! CRAZY! Why couldn’t I just stop? I am always late! I am always in a race to get to the next appointment, the next job, the next soccer, baseball, robotics, whatever…..
I figured that getting something from this beautiful sunset was better than getting nothing from it! I am pretty sure that if a cop were to have driven by me at that moment, I would have gotten a ticket! If you can’t text while driving, I am pretty sure you shouldn’t take pictures while driving!
So I really started thinking more and more about the craziness of these photos and what they represent about me, about my life, about society. We are all living life at 65! Wouldn’t it be amazing if we didn’t have to enjoy life’s beauty as we drive down the highway? I’m speaking in metaphors now. I just feel like I am running through life so fast! I want to slow down! I want to enjoy my ten and seven year olds. I want to enjoy my darling husband who still takes my breathe away. I want to explore and discover. I want to try new things. But I am always running to that next whatever and if I can’t make it to that meeting, how am I supposed to find the time for all of the things I REALLY want to do? How do we find balance? How do we find time? I NEED to find time.
I can’t get that sunset back! I can’t get my infants back. They are gone, as the first 37 years of my life are gone. Before I know it, I will be 50 and my boys will be graduating from high school and off to college. Will I have done the things I always planned on doing with them, or will I have never found the time?
So look at these pictures. Really look at them. Do they represent something in your life? Do the blurry images remind you that you need to slow down so that you can enjoy what gifts God brings to us everyday? Do the images with their imperfections remind you of how your life is imperfect and how you want to fix it? Do the small glimpses of beauty fuel your hunger for more of God’s beauty in your life? I know I have been speeding through, as I have planned. But it is not MY plan. I need to slow down so I can hear God’s plan for me.
Proverbs 16:9 – The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps.
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